


Play Just Like Children

by Chash



Series: A Wide-Screen Viewing [2]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 14:09:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13249845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chash/pseuds/Chash
Summary: Clarke doesn't know what exactly a Quidditch video game has to do with Monty's childhood hopes and dreams, but he's invested in it, so the least she can do is help him beta test it.Whatever that means.





	Play Just Like Children

**Author's Note:**

> ftr I’m using the American version of football in this because I put negative effort into pretending it takes place in the UK, so sorry for incoherent worldbuilding
> 
> Fill for [liminal-lady](https://liminal-lady.tumblr.com/)!

 

From what Clarke can tell, disappointment with the interaction of the wizarding world and the Muggle world is about 90% of Raven and Monty’s life motivation. Which does make sense, admittedly. Clarke was kind of disappointed with things that were lacking in the Muggle world, when she started interacting with it, and it’s probably even worse for Muggleborns. After all, they have all these stories about magic and wizards and dragons, but they don’t think those things are real. Clarke always knew Muggles existed, and always assumed that if she wanted to learn about them, she could just find a book.

Honestly, she doesn’t know why previous generations of wizards are so uninformed about Muggles. It really doesn’t make any sense.

Regardless, Raven and Monty are Muggleborns who want wizard stuff to live up to all their expectations, which is why they create Fantasy Quidditch League.

“Don’t we already play Quidditch?” Bellamy asks. “Why do we need to fantasize about it too?”

“Aren’t you a Muggleborn?” Jasper shoots back. “Don’t you know about fantasy football?”

“I don’t know about any Muggle sports,” he says. “It’s confusing enough that I know about Quidditch. Which one is football? The one where they kick the ball?”

“No, the other one, where they throw the ball,” says Raven.

“Sometimes they kick it!” says Monty. “I think. Honestly, I don’t actually know sports, but I do know that fantasy football is a huge letdown for one reason: it’s not actually fantasy.”

“If that was supposed to clear stuff up, it didn’t,” says Bellamy.

“Okay,” says Monty, “imagine me. I’m this dorky little kid who reads all the time and loves nerd stuff.”

“Why do we have to imagine that?” Raven asks. “That’s literally still you.”

Monty ignores her. “And I hear about this thing called fantasy football and I think it’s the coolest thing in the world. I assume it’s a video game where you get to play football as various fantasy races, but no. It’s just this thing where people make up their own football teams and pretend they’re playing against each other.”

“And that’s bad,” says Clarke, frowning.

“It’s not nearly as awesome. Which is why fantasy Quidditch  _is_  going to be that awesome. We’re going to make this happen.”

“We still don’t know what we’re making happen,” Clarke reminds him, and Raven grins.

“Wizard video games. That needs to start being a thing. And we’re starting with making Monty’s fantasy Quidditch dreams come true.”

“Isn’t Quidditch already a fantasy?” Bellamy asks. He’s very attached to this point. “We’re on broomsticks. We’re wizards. Sounds like a fantasy to me.”

“Nonhuman magical creatures can’t play, though,” says Raven.

“Which is bullshit,” says Jasper. He’s been surprisingly quiet about this; it really must be Monty’s pet project. But he’s dating a veela right now and has feelings on nonhuman issues.

“So the idea is that you’re creating a team and then playing it in a league,” says Monty, ignoring him. “Either you do it as a single player versus the AI or there’s a multiplayer mode where your team goes up against other teams.”

“But what do you actually  _do_?” asks Clarke.

“First, you draft. That’s putting together the team. It works slightly differently depending on if you’re doing single- or multiplayer. Which do you want me to explain first?”

Clarke already has a headache, but everyone else except Bellamy looks engaged. So she puts her head on his shoulder, and he kisses her hair. “Whatever you think is best. I’ll catch up.”

“It’s a lot easier to play, don’t worry. Basically, I have a roster of three-hundred named, pre-generated characters. Ten races, with thirty characters of each race.”

“Okay, by  _race_ ,” says Bellamy. “What are we talking here? Giants? Goblins? Leprechauns?”

“We decided to make our own,” says Raven.

“Yeah, I wanted races to have their own pros and cons,” says Monty. “That’s how it works in Dungeons and Dragons, which was kind of my inspiration. Like, elves are nimble, so they get a bonus to their dexterity. But that works partially because those other races aren’t real. I don’t want a game where if a giant plays it they’re offended because they automatically have a penalty to intelligence or something. So we came up with ten fantasy races that have various advantages and disadvantages. Like—“ He pulls a character up on the TV. “This is a Mora. They have eyes on the sides of their head, like grazing animals do, which gives them a great field of vision. But they tend to be slower and clumsier. There’s one Mora who’s very light and quick, and she’d make a great seeker, but most of them work better in other positions.”

“So you get options for your team,” Bellamy prompts, before Monty gets too carried away with individual pros and cons.

“Yeah, the basic single-player mode gives you a random selection of eighty characters, and you play in an eight-team league. There’s a random draft order so you won’t always get the first pick you want, but your players do level up as you play, and they retain that. So if you keep picking some really crappy player, they’ll improve. Some of them have hidden unlocks. Like this guy,” he says, pulling up a different character. “He’s basically Magikarp.”

“That doesn’t clarify anything for some of us,” Clarke reminds him.

“It’s a Pokémon. It’s awful, but if you play with it enough, it turns into a really good Pokémon. If you play with this guy he’ll get very slightly better every game until the twentieth, and then he gets  _awesome_. And he keeps that upgrade, and you can recruit the improved version next time.”

“And that only works when the player has him on their team, right?” Miller asks, and Clarke shoots him a dirty look. As Monty’s boyfriend, he’s more up on the terminology than she is, and he really likes video games, whereas Clarke still has no idea how they work.  _Like wizard chess, but digital_  is the extent of her understanding. But as another pureblood, Clarke feels as if he should be as in the dark as she is.

“Yeah, only experience gained on the PC team counts, but that means if you keep picking, say, Neesa Lynta,” he says, pulling up yet another character, “then as she gets better, the AI will be more inclined to take her from you in future drafts, because she’s better than characters you haven’t built up.”

“Okay,” Bellamy says, with a tone that means he’s taking over the situation. “This is really cool, Monty, but–I’m still not sure what we’re actually doing here. I’m not getting any more information out of what you’re saying. This is basically my limit.”

“For a Muggleborn you’re really bad with video games,” Clarke teases, and he grins.

“Aren’t you supposed to be into that, Slytherin?”

“Yeah,  _bad at video games_  is a known Slytherin kink. But he’s right,” she adds, to Monty. “What did you want us to do, exactly?”

“You need to be my test group. Everyone else I know knows too much about video games. I want to see how you guys do with the tutorial.”

“Then shouldn’t you have sent us into it blind?” Bellamy asks. “Instead of giving us the whole spiel?”

“Did anything I said make the game make more sense to you, or are you more confused than before?” Monty asks, not unreasonably.

There’s obviously no good answer to that, so Bellamy just straightens up, disentangling himself from Clarke. “Okay, so–tell us what to do.”

Monty grins. “Who wants the controller?”

They agree that Bellamy can take point on the actual selections, and Clarke settles against his side so she can advise.

And, she has to admit, Monty did a pretty good job with the whole thing. The tutorial takes it slow, giving them a small, pre-made team so they can learn the controls, and then adding in each of the different character types with a short explanation of what their advantages and disadvantages are.

“How does it know when someone catches the snitch?” she asks Monty, as Bellamy tries to use a combo to score a goal. He can control one beater or chaser at a time, while the computer controls the rest of the team, but he doesn’t have the option of being the seeker or the keeper.

“Programming,” says Raven. “There’s a base time range for when the snitch can be found, which goes from five to twenty minutes. It’s impossible to find the snitch right away, no matter how good your seeker is, because no one wants to feel like they lost to the RNG before they got a chance to do anything. After that, it’s basically chance. Using the seeker’s stats, advantages, and disadvantages, it spits out a time when they’ll catch the snitch. Whichever team’s seeker has the lower time gets it.”

“You must have put so much work into this,” she murmurs. “It’s amazing.”

Raven grins. “And you haven’t even gotten to the good part yet.”

“That’s because Bellamy sucks at this game,” says Miller, and Bellamy scowls.

“Fuck you, it’s a tutorial. I’m  _learning_ , dickface.”

“Learn faster, I want to play.”

It  _is_  an in-depth tutorial, aimed not only at teaching the basics of this game, but of gaming in general, but Bellamy makes it through, finally getting to a small draft, picking his team, and beating the computer with them.

“So, now we’re at the good part,” says Monty. “Pick multiplayer and we can do a tournament.”

“I’m not sure I’m ready for that,” he admits, holding out the controller. “There are four of you, me and Clarke can watch.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun,” Monty wheedles.

“But then someone else can’t play. We’re good. I’ll just heckle.”

It’s probably for the best; Monty, Raven, Miller, and Jasper take the controls, and Clarke settles into Bellamy’s lap, his arms around her. It’s the kind of thing she thinks Muggles do a lot, gathering around a television to play games and talk trash, and Clarke can admit she understands the appeal. There’s something warm and companionable about it.

“Hey, we’ve got Bellamy in the draft!” Jasper crows.

Bellamy shifts a little under her, curious. “What?”

“Some of the characters are not very subtle parodies of real Quidditch players,” says Raven, moving her cursor over to find the character in question. “All the Argonauts are in here, and a few others too. Just for fun.”

“Wait, you named him  _Buzzayou Bloke_?” Clarke asks. “Really?”

“I think it’s got a nice ring to it,” says Monty. “Nate’s Jathan Pounder, if it makes you feel better.”

“What about me?”

“Clank Manticore,” says Raven.

“I’ll take it. Is there any way you can make it so all of us are in the draft? Because that would be way more fun.”

“Turns out hacking programs is a lot easier when you made them and you’re a witch,” says Raven, with a flick of her wand. About a dozen of the character portraits flicker out, replaced by vaguely familiar faces. “Okay, I’m definitely taking Emori, she’s a great seeker.”

Monty’s next. “I’m taking Jathan Pounder, because I’m a good boyfriend.”

“I’m taking Buzzayou,” says Miller. “I think he’s going to be a great seeker.”

“I programmed him, and he’s not,” Raven shoots back.

“I’ll take Clank, so Clarke doesn’t feel left out.”

“Thanks,” she says, and Jasper blows her a kiss.

The teams are pretty universally horrible. There’s an unofficial rule that no real Quidditch player can be in their actual position, so Raven’s justification for picking Emori falls apart pretty quickly. Clank ends up a keeper, which is both her and Clank’s worst position, while Miller puts Buzzayou as his seeker, as promised. Their teams–Jasper’s Hogwarts Hogwashers and Miller’s Flying Losers–end up as the first match, so Monty and Raven set aside their controllers and settle in to watch with Clarke and Bellamy.

“This is the grudge match, right?” Monty asks. “Infamous rivals Buzzayou Bloke and Clank Manticore, finally going head to head. May the best player win.”

“That’s how it’s supposed to work,” Raven says. “But since every player is assigned to a shitty role–”

“That just means our innate skills will come out,” Jasper says. “I’ve been playing video games for longer than Miller, but he’s a very promising rookie. This is all going to come down to skill.”

“Oh my god, you’re going to commentate this game, aren’t you,” says Raven, flat.

“I figured Monty would do it, he doesn’t have to play.”

“Yeah, I’ve got this. Come on, Raven,” he adds, grinning. “It’s not Quidditch without commentary.”

“And this is his dream,” Clarke adds. She nudges him. “Is it as awesome as you wanted it to be?”

“It really is. You think it’s going to take off? Can wizards get into fantasy Quidditch?”

Right on cue, Miller has one of his characters lob some sort of acid spit at Jasper’s keeper, blinding him, and Jasper swears revenge.

Clarke shakes her head, smiling. “Honestly? Yeah. I think it’s going to be a hit. I’ve got next round,” she adds, settling back against Bellamy.

It really is the perfect way to spend an afternoon; people are going to love it.


End file.
